Oh dear…what to write about. (Warning: Complaining ahead. Continue at your own risk!)

I’m cranky. Have been since my birthday, last Friday. I had decided to relax for the day and just do basically whatever I wanted to do. I expected that the fruit would be able to handle doing their chores (after all, they’ve only been doing them for a year or more now) without being nagged and that they would perhaps, since it was their mommy’s birthday, go the extra mile and do a few of mine. But, they apparantly didn’t read my mind and took the day off too. When I surfaced from my self-imposed hyper-focus, I realized that I would literally have to kick my way out of the living room if I were going to get ready for F1’s basketball game and that the dining room hadn’t been cleaned (although it had been used plenty!) all day. I couldn’t even see the surface of the table. KABOOM! I was very upset. Like crying upset. I really hate birthdays and Mother’s Day. Because I expect to be treated like a princess on those two days (and really, only on those two days) and my expectations are never met. Maybe I don’t make them clear enough, but it seems a little…self-defeating, selfish, and maybe even disheartening to have to explain that I should be treated like a princess on these days. So, after a small amount of cleanup, we went to F1’s game, which his team won. But he didn’t get to play, something he was tremendously disappointed about, because he had apparantly been planning to surprise me with some extra good playing for my birthday present. So now, not only did I feel like crying, never baked my cake, and now I have a little guy very upset with himself because he didn’t get to play.

And I’m still cranky. There are some extenuating circumstances that maybe I’ll explain in a while, but I’m still cranky. And I need to get in the Word, and stop being so cranky. Because I’ve said some things to the kids that I really regret. And I’ve allowed our schedule to be blown off course today. So, now I’m off to do some prayin’ and Bible readin’. Because He knows what it is all about and why I’m like this…way better than I do. And since He knows what’s wrong, He knows how to fix it. Way better than I do.

Prayers would be good here. Thanks.